Strategies for Happiness Newsletter

Day Ten: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

2010-05-18T12:01:00.000-07:00

The last week has been a whirl wind. I have had so many things happening, so many things I needed to make happen, so many challenges and scary moments. Even so, I am here to say. . . Thank You!!

Here is my list for today!

I have completed day 2 of the course that was giving me nightmares. I actually did a decent job. The thing that was so stressful about this course was not the subject matter. I like Cascading Style Sheets. The problem was that the students were so advanced, or at least they seemed to be. I did not want to go in today. But I did, and thanks to my friend Greg, who gave me many great ideas, I was able to fill up the day with many useful exercises. I don't plan to look at the evaluations, I am just so thankful it is over.
My car is going to be crack free. A few days ago, I noticed that my windshield had a crack, about a foot long. I was hoping I could live with it, but considering I am going to Toronto today, and next week I will be driving out to British Columbia with my daughter, I thought it better to bite the bullet and get it done.
Because I am getting a new windshield, I won't have to clean it. It should look clean and clear, great for when we drive across the country.
I am grateful that the cost of the windshield is going to be so much less then I thought it would be.
I am so grateful and happy that I was able to get someone else to take my course tomorrow, so I would be free to spend an extra day with my mother before I leave to go out west.

What are you grateful for? I want to hear about it. Join the Year of Living Gratefully challenge at Year of Living Gratefully Challenge. Spread the word. Let's get the whole world on board.

Day Five: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge - 360 Days to go!

2010-05-13T20:27:00.000-07:00

Thanks for joining me again for Day Five of the challenge.

Gratitude is not only about saying thank you. It is also about appreciation. Just being able to sit back and smile at the little things that happen to brighten your day. About taking joy in your friends and loved ones.

So here is what I appreciate about today.

I am soon going to bed, and don't have to think about getting up tomorrow until I want to!
I was given extra work next week which means I will not starve next month.
I got to spend the evening with my marvelous, talented, funny, cute and magical daughter who helped me perfect one of my most important projects.
I have made plans to spend time with my other marvelous, talented, funny, cute and magical daughter tomorrow.
By helping one of my students solve a problem with her database, I learned more about Access and may be able to use my new skills to get more business.

Thanks for taking the time to check out my list for today. How about joining me in the Year of Living Gratefully. Good night!

Day Four: The Year of Living Gratefully

2010-05-12T20:48:00.000-07:00

This is the saga of my ongoing commitment to live this year full of gratitude and not complaining. For more information, check out The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

Another great day. I am happy and grateful that . . .

The sun was out and warming up the world. It was still a bit cool, which made it refreshing.
I had a new day, a new class, and new challenge.
One of my students presented me with and interesting challenge which I have found a possible solution. I can't wait to tell her about it tomorrow.
My new hair colour. It makes me feel so pretty and colourful. I have had so many wonderful compliments about it.
I had a special time with my step granddaughter, Hailey. Though it was short, we had a lovely snuggle and talked and planned out upcoming trip to Niagara Falls.

It is time for me to hit the sack. Good night!

Day Three: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

2010-05-11T20:31:00.000-07:00

Today, I am grateful for . . .

I had a second great day teaching my favourite course and the students loved it.
Getting to watch my favourite TV show - Lost
Positive feedback on my business plan.
I am living my dream jobs:
- I am an IT trainer specializing in Visual Basic, Microsoft Access and Excel
- I am a published author
- I am a publisher with the privilege of publishing the works of 4 other authors
- I am a public speaker developing my own workshops
I am so grateful to have met my workshop and publishing partner Lesley Marcovich, author of The Biography Workbook and soon The Biography Handbook

Being Grateful for Not So Good Things

2010-05-10T20:10:00.000-07:00

Day Two: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge (TYofLGC)

The crack in my windshield. OK, when I first saw the crack, I was far from happy or grateful about it. Then I thought to myself, I can let myself get all upset and feeling sorry for myself, or I can choose to find something good about this. I was tempted to start telling everyone about my misfortune, looking for that sympathetic ear - Oh poor you - How awful. Then I said, no, I am not going to do that. I can choose to feel sorry for myself, or choose to snap out of it and find something positive about it. So, I choose to not complain, and choose to believe that good things will come out this.
My opportunity to once again teach Microsoft Access - I love teaching this course, seeing peoples eye's light up as they get the process of designing a database, feeling the positive energy because they are enjoying the class and seeing that the subject is actually fun. I have a good group of people who are responding well and even laugh at my jokes.
The opportunity to hang with my daugther.
The opportunity to sit with a cup of tea, vegitate and relax.
I made it into the gym for a workout

Please join me on committing to your own TYofLGC. How can you take part, you ask? Here's how?

Go to the following link for more information: http://www.strategies4happiness.com/gratitude.php.
Join mailing list to 1) Declare to the universe you decision to Live Gratefully 2) Allow me to send you updates and more information as the year progress.
Contact me at yearoflivinggratefullychallenge@strategies4happiness.com and let me know what your 5 things are so I can post them on the blog.
Forward this blog and website link to anyone you know to spread the word

Looking forward to hearing from you!

Happy Mother's Day!

2010-05-09T00:00:00.000-07:00

Day One: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

Thank you for stopping by my Blog! Please explore all this Blog has to offer, then jog on over to http://abookinside.blogspot.com/. If you would like to visit a different Blog in the jog, go to http://blogjogday.blogspot.com/.

This is Day One of The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge. I invite you to join me in living the next year full of gratitute and joy. For more information, go to: Strategies for Happiness Year of Living Gratefully Challenge .

Here is my first entry for The Year of Living Gratefully

I am happy and grateful that my children are healthily, happy and - well - my children - I have the privilege of being mother to two of the most wonderful beings on the face of the planet.
I am so grateful to my Mother, who took such wonderful loving care of me all my life, and continues to do so to this day. Thanks Mom!
I am happy and grateful that my husband is the sweetest, kindest and most gentle of men - and he lets me be me.
I appreciate living in a beautiful country that allows me the freedom to be what I want to be and affords me so many wonderful opportunities (Oh Canada!).
I love that because of the internet and other technologies, I have been able to write and publish my book Strategies for Happiness.

There you have it, my first list. This one was easy, but wait till I run out of easy stuff. No matter, I am going to do it. So can you. I am looking forward to hearing from you.

Make your pledge by joining The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge Pledge List.

For more information, check out The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge at http://www.strategies4happiness.com/gratitude.php. Let me know how you are going to celebrate this challenge. Spread the word. It is never too late to live gratefully.

Hugs

Donna

The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

2010-05-08T19:22:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow is Mother's Day - Hi Mom, thanks for everything!

This is the day we set aside to say thank you to the most special person, Mom. It is a nice idea on the surface, but does it really do the trick. Why do we wait until that one day to express to our Mother's all that she means to us. I think we should be doing that 365.

But why stop there. What about our Fathers. What about all the rest of the family and friends that have made a difference in our lives.

In fact, why not be grateful for everyone and every thing in our life.

Every have one of those days where things just don’t go right. You get into a slump of being upset and feeling sorry for yourself. Next time that happens, snap out of it. Don't allow yourself the luxury of self-pity.

Instead, make a list all the things that you can find to be grateful for. It may be something that you have, or something that has happened to you, or it may be something that you don't have. Be creative, be thankful and be happy.

It is really difficult to feel bad and down in the dumps when you are full of gratitude. You only have room in you heart and mind for one or the other, not both at the same time.

In light of this concept and also in honour of tomorrow being such a special day, I am issuing a challenge to the world. From this day forth, and every day for the following year, I am going come to my blog and make a list of 5 things I am happy for in that day.

I want you to take up the challenge in your own life and join me. Therefore, starting March 9th, 2010, I declare as the first day of The Year of Living Gratefully (YoLG) Challenge.

Come to my blog and comment on my day to day journey into the heart of Gratitude. Comment on my blog as to what your own list of Gratitude items are. Cheer me and others on. Start your own blog to display your gratitude victories. Remember, list 5 things you are grateful for in that day. Try to avoid repeating the same thing twice in a row. That would be cheating.

Contact me with whatever you are planning to do in order to celebrate A Year of Living Gratefully, and I will post it on my blog, along with any links. (donna.hedley@sympatico.ca) Spread the word, forward this post, talk to others. Together, we can help the world be a better place by being and example.

I am officially kicking off A Year of Living Gratefully on March 9th, but you can kick off your own YoLG any time. No matter what time of year it is, no matter where on the planet, stand up and Pledge that :

Today, and every day this year, I __________ [Enter your name] am going to live with a heart full of Gratitude and Joy. I will find the beauty in every aspect of my life, even if I have to make it up. I will learn to learn the lesson, find the bliss, spread the joy with everything and everyone in my world. I will Live this year full of Gratitude and Joy.
Every day from this day forth, I will list 5 things that I am grateful for.

_____________________ Signed

_____________________ Dated

Please drop me a line and let me know what you are going to do for The Year of Living Gratefully.

Hugs to All

Donna
donna.hedley@sympatico.ca

It's All in Your Mind

2010-04-08T11:28:00.000-07:00

What is your story? Is it one of a victim or a victor? Take a serious look at the words that come out of your mouth. Take an even closer look at the words that don't even make it to your mouth, but are floating around in that marvelous organ called you brain.

Are these thoughts supportive and empowering, or do they cut you down flat? Problem is, the majority of those thoughts do not support us in any way or form. They repeat over and over, nasty harmful messages that we have either been taught, or taught ourselves.

Our greatest challenge is to learn how to overcome those thoughts, how to re-write out story, how to become the victor.

Here are some videos that will make you think (good thoughts I hope) and give you some ideas as to how to change.

But first, let me invite you to purchase a copy of my book Strategies for Happiness: How to Achieve Your Happiness Potential.

Here are some other ideas about how you can change your life story.

The first video is by David Ellzey and is called Beyond the Mind's Limitations where he talks about The Sedona Method:

Another tool is EFT, Emotional Freedom Technique. Here is a video by Carol Look an the subject:

And then there is Bob Proctor. (Part 1)

Part 2

Do you have any tips to help people write the story of their life their way?

Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

2009-11-16T19:21:00.000-08:00

What is it you want? A simple question, but not so easy to answer, really. We often end up saying things that reflect things was want to eliminate instead focusing on what we would like to see happen.

This is not a new concept, we have heard a lot about this concept lately. Yet, I am not sure that we fully realize it's implication or possibilities that come from it. You might say, oh, that’s just the positive thinking thing again. Actually, it is not just about positive thinking. It is about redirective thinking.

And really, it is really simple. Whenever you find yourself slipping into a negative mode, rephrase it from the negative you see, to the positive you want. Then take it a step further. Ask yourself, what can I do, or what am I doing about it. What steps am I taking to make the thing I want to happen. That does not mean getting caught up in the worry of trying to figure out what you need to do, it is just thinking of something positive you can do to work towards it. If the thing you do does not make it happen, no worries, just adjust and keep moving.

When you are not happy about something, ask yourself, "What do I want to see happen?" then ask "What can I do to make it happen?" or "What will it take to have this happen?"

Sometimes it is just a matter of letting it happen. Sometimes there are different steps you can take to facilitate it. Whatever, be appreciative of the process. Don't allow yourself to get caught up in fear, anger, blame or belittlement. If you fall down on your face, get up and try again. Overcome the need/desire/temptation to wallow in self pity.

You don't like to see how women are treated. Instead of focusing on the suffering women may have had to face, ask yourself the question, "What do I want to see?" The answer might be, "Women treated with respect." What does that look like? What steps can you take to help it happen?

Some women like to rant and rave about how bad women have had it in the past, and I say what good does that do? The past is past. We are here and now. I am a woman. I don't spend time and energy complaining and ranting and raving about how men have treated them. I choose to see the other women as the powerful beings they are. Not because they are women, but because they are. I have chosen to not see myself as someone down trodden and abused, because I am only that if I choose to see myself as that.

I want to do things in and with my life. I see myself doing those things. It doesn't matter to me if I am a woman, I just choose to do them, and I do. I am not special because of this, I just am.

And, being a woman, or a person with a challenge of any sort, I may come to decision of how I want to think/live/be that works for me. Others may not agree with what I am saying which can sometimes be frustrating. They may not like or understand me or my stand. It is worthwhile for me to listen, because we can always learn, but what is more important is that I feel strongly about myself and my view to not worry about what others think. If what I want bothers them, that is their problem, not mine. I do not have to make them agree or be on my side. All I need to do is be the best me I can.

Today, I was wandering around on the web. I came across a video where a black woman was asking how could she prepare her son for going to school where he was going to be learning about slavery and Martin Luther King. She said that as she was speaking to her son, she could see a look come over his face as he started to take in what she said, a look of disbelief and pain. She felt horrible, but she felt that it was an important part of their heritage, and that he should know what had happened to his people, and one of the greats who had worked so hard to change things for the better.

The response, in essence was, why do you continue to look back at the horror. Why not discuss Martin Luther King the light of the vision of his dream, not what he was fighting against. She was being encouraged to live life how she wants it to be, instead of always comparing it against what had been.

I thought this was a marvelous way of looking at it. You don’t ignore the horror of life, but at the same time, you don't give it any energy to continue. You choose that you want it to be another way, and move in that direction.

There is the idea that if we don't think about the mistakes of the past, we are doomed to repeat them. Well, I say, be aware of where you came from, but don’t live there. Put your energy on where you want to go and be. To get to where you want to be, look, act, feel move in that direction and never again look back over your shoulder to where you came from.

If something is not the way you want it to be, focus on how you want it to be in a spirit of joy and appreciation, to change things for the better. Do it for you, not for anyone else, without feeling the need to change others. Maybe other need to change, but that is not up to you to make happen.

If you find yourself in a state of grumpiness, check yourself to see what you are still trying to prove and change. If you are still trying to change others to believe as you believe, you need to examine your thoughts and ideas.

This is all great and fine, but what if the situation involves the safety of someone who is not in a position to help themselves, like small children. We can't just sit by and let it happen. Again, don't focus on what is wrong, instead ask the question, "How do I want to see it be and what can I do to make it happen?"

As Gandi said "You must be the change you want to see in the world."

Strategies for Happiness: How to Achieve Your Happiness Potential is now available on Amazon.

Buy your copy today!

Check out this wonderful video!

"Validation" is a fable about the magic of free parking.

Around the Kitchen Table with Donna

Check out the new radio show Around the Kitchen Table with Donna. It is so much fun to sit around the kitchen table with friends and family and having a good old fashion gab fest, sharing your thoughts, dreams and ideas, or just having so much fun laughing and sharing jokes. I will be sharing thoughts and insights, interviewing interesting guests, telling jokes and stories that will brighten your day. I want to hear from you. So join me around the kitchen table for a cup of tea to chat about life's important things, like friends, family, dreams and double chocolate fudge brownie sundaes.

Keep you eyes open for the next show. Call in to the show or contact me to become a guest.

Don't forget to get your copy of Strategies for Happiness: How to Achieve Your Happiness Potential is now available on Amazon. Buy your copy today!

What Does it All Mean? - Whatever You Want It To

2009-06-12T11:30:00.000-07:00

Ever had this happen to you? You are at a party, talking to someone you are attracted to. In the middle of a sentence where you are sharing something that is very important to you, he/she quickly glances at his watch and then yawns. What flashes through your mind. "I am boring. He/she finds me boring. Therefore I am a boring person. No one will ever find me interesting. I will die alone because I am the more boring person on the face of the earth, and that is of course, the worst fate to ever befall on any human being."

Maybe your scenario is a bit different, but the results are the same. You are in a situation, you observe what is happening around you, how others are reacting and responding to you and you decide to attach a meaning to that event. And since you don’t know what is really going on inside of the other person’s head, you can attach any meaning you want. The problem is that oft times, the meaning you attach is totally off base. Because of the meaning you choose to believe, you might end up missing all sorts of wonderful opportunities.

Take our above mentioned friend. He/she may not be bored with you at all. Maybe they are tired, having been up the previous night finishing a project that was important to them. Maybe they have some problem they are trying to work out, but they are really enjoying being with you. Maybe they have to be somewhere, but want to spend as much time with you as possible. Or, maybe they are bored.

The thing is, unless you ask them outright, you don’t know. So why fill in the blanks with negative possibles. Instead, think and expect the best until proven otherwise.

This ability to attach meaning to the events in our world can be both liberating and burdensome. If we choose to attach a negative meaning, we can cause ourselves so much grief and heartache. On the other hand, if we decide to make the meaning positive, we can empower ourselves to take control our attitudes and actions.

If we decide something like "He/she thinks I am boring" we have a habit of not stopping there. We might determine our own worthiness based on what we think the other person supposedly thinking. If we say "He/she thinks I am boring" it is not a long way to thinking "Therefore, I must be boring." The next thing in this slippery slop is to say "Therefore I am a bad person because I am boring." And finally the ever popular "Put me in a rocket and shoot me into outer space, because my existence is endangering the whole planet.”

The key is to catch yourself in the act of attaching a meaning to an event and questioning it. Is it a valid way of looking at things? Do I have all of the facts? Am I Manufacturing something here, or is it possibility real.

While the fact that sometimes, the individuals you associate with may not always be enthralled with what you have to say, it is unlikely that you are a total bore, and certainly not a horrible person. Examine the meanings you appliy to your life and circumstance, and decide to either change the meaning you create, or accept that other people’s behaviour does not define who and what you are.

Order your copy of Strategies for Happiness: How to Achieve Your Happiness Potential Today!

Looking for a great idea for a gift? Strategies for Happiness: How to Achieve Your Happiness Potential is the answer.

It’s Not Because It’s Meant to Be, It is Because I Choose It to Be

2009-05-14T11:00:00.000-07:00

I have an opportunity to have my own radio show! This is another amazing and wonderful thing to add to list of most wonderful things that have been happening to me left and right over the past year, with so many pieces of my puzzling life coming together. I am in awe and wonder of it all.

First my book Strategies for Happiness, then my publishing company Sassy Sunflower Books, and now my own radio show. When I got that phone call asking me if I would be interested in starting a show about happiness, I was stunned (OK, some may say I am already pretty stunned.)

I got the call while driving home from visiting my Mother in Toronto. It had already been such an exquisite day. I had met with a new client to talk about options for publishing her books. We had sat and chatted for over 4 hours, the time just flew by. When I left her, I had a 4 ½ hour drive a head of me. As I can get pretty drowsy on long road trips, I always have a pack of gum handy to keep me awake. I didn’t need the gum though, because I was so energized after the meeting that the time and miles (I mean kilometers, but they are not so poetic) just flew by.

I stopped at one of my favorite places along the way for a picnic break. The sun was shining, the breeze cool, but comfortable. I sat in my chair, sipped my tea, and looked up at the newly budding tree tops. I was filled with such a bliss of the moment. It was a feeling that was both brilliant in its intensity, as well as being one of peaceful joy.

After I finished lunch, I took a walk along the trail, one of my favorite traditions. I had decided that I would memorize the Dr. Seuss classic, Oh The Places You Will Go. If anyone saw me, they would have pegged me as insane (as my husband always says I am). I was walking, talking to myself, reciting the poem, proclaiming joy to the trees and any animal that would listen to me. I felt like a being of light.

I got in my car and started home again. Not very far along, the phone rang. I thought, should I answer it or let it go. It was probably one my daughters just calling to say hi, or my mother saying I forgot something at her place, or a telemarketer… No, I would answer it.

The gentleman introduced himself, and told me the network he represented. He asked me if I would be interested in hosting a weekly hour long radio show on Happiness. I stopped the car (Ok, maybe I should have stopped it before I answered, but at least I stopped it then). We spoke for about 20 minutes. After he told me all about the opportunity, he asked me, on a scale of 1 to 10, how interested I was in pursuing this. I said 11!

He said he was interviewing a number of prospects, but he felt that I was a great candidate. He would let me know shortly whether it was go.

After chatting with the producer, I continued on my way. He had asked me to send him some episode ideas so he could get an idea of what I would like to do with the show. Just 6 or so, nothing too complex.

Of course, my brain was in full tilt. I couldn’t stop myself, the ideas poured in fast and furious. Don’t worry; I took the time to pull over to the side of the road in order to write them down. I didn’t try and do this while driving. (That would just be nuts!) I ended up with over 35 ideas.

It took me a lot longer then it would have with all that stopping, but finally I arrived home. It had been an exhilarating two hours, planning, dreaming, visualizing.

The next day I just crashed. I hadn’t slept well and was teaching a class that I was not as prepared for as I would have liked. Reality started to sneak in and reek havoc on my brain and emotions. I started to assume that the show would not happen.

Not because he would not choose me. Even though he had to talk to other people, I knew deep down that he already had chosen me. However, in order to make it happen, I had to provide some capital to help finance it. Where was I to get all that money? Not to mention all of the other little voice negatives yapping away about me not being good enough, smart enough, funny enough etc.

But how can I say no, just because of a bit of money. It feels so right and sure and true, just like my book and Sassy. I have decided that I am going to make it happen, because I choose to make it happen.

I am putting the law of attraction to the test. I am focusing on the idea that the money I need will manifest itself within the next three weeks. I believe that even though we are not suppose to worry about how the universe will provide, we still can be active and get ourselves out there to be in a position to allow it to happen. Therefore, I am open to any ideas, suggestions or donations that come my way. I am allowing myself to be an excellent receiver, which will help me to give.

I can build and manage websites, do desktop publishing, database design, even basic administrative assistant work, whatever service I can provide.

The more I think about this, the more possibilities I see it can open up for me. Not only will it be something that could provide for me, but I also see how my show could be really helpful to listeners. I can do it anywhere so I can travel as well. I can use it to promote my book, and the books of my authors. I can use it to promote Sassy. The more I think about it, how can I refuse?

A few weeks ago, when I first started Sassy, I was in my kitchen, thinking about the wonderful opportunity that was unfolding before me. The thought flew through my brain that maybe my time had come, that finally I was listening to what the universe was saying and therefore it was rewarding me. I was finally awakening to my meaning and purpose in life; that this was meant to be. Then, just as suddenly, I was aware of another thought that said “Hogwash! It has nothing to do with reward, or fate or purpose or being meant. It is all about you, that you decided what you want, you are going for it, and you choosing it, and so it is happening. You are the creator. You go for it girl!”

I didn’t specifically ask for a radio show, but it will be a means and a way for me to do what I want: Travel, become financial independent, be independent but most of all – no – not most of all, but equally important, I can use this as a tool to help others to become more aware of their happiness potential, to give them an opportunity to realize they can and must live their dreams and passion, and live life on their own terms. What a blast! What a honour! What a humbling experience!

There She Goes Again!

2009-05-03T16:00:00.000-07:00

My husband says I am insane. Mind you, when he says that, he has a smile on his face that seems to say that he rather likes that about me. You see, I am always coming up with new schemes and ideas of things I want to do. I don't think he is the only one that questions my sanity. Every time I start a new project, my friends just roll their eyes and say "There she goes again". I have tried so many things, with varying degrees of success. Well, I guess that depends on your definition of success.

Once I got the idea that I wanted to become a school bus driver. I figured it would be perfect for a young mother with pre-school children. I could work, make some money, and take my children with me. I applied for the job, was trained, made three attempts to get my bus drivers license, and then was ready to go. However, it did not hit me until my first day of real work a major flaw with my plan. The bus was packed full the kids. Big one, tiny ones, slimy ones and so forth. And I hated children. Well, my kids were OK, but the others... So there I was, on the bus full of nasty bratty monsters that I had to chauffeur around. It was hell!

My one ray of sunshine is a memory of one sweet little girl. She looked up at me, put her small hands around my arm, quickly kissed it, and then ran out of the bus to her waiting mother. I guess kids are not all that bad, after all.

I did that for a few months, and then I had to quite because we moved to another part of the country. Sweet salvation! I still have nightmares about it.

Then there was the time I decided I was going to sell vacuum cleaners. Yes, I became a dreaded vacuum cleaner sales rep. I had been given a demonstration of a most wonderful machine and really wanted to get one for myself, but couldn't afford it. So I figured if I sold them, maybe I could make enough money to buy one. Because of this, I talked myself into leasing a car so I could get around. Here I am in the hole before I even started. Our training consisted on my talking a bunch of friends into letting my sponsors try and talk them into buying one. Nobody bought one. Finally, I went out to do some presentations on my own. On my second presentation, the friend I was presenting to thought it was a good machine, but was it really worth the hefty price tag. It hit me that they were not. Another not so happy ending.

I tried to help finances by becoming a pizza delivery person. It was not too bad of a job, I was able to work nights so that my husband could take care of then. I even got a free pizza now and then. It was one of those deliver in 30 minutes or it is free deals. One night I was off doing my thing, delivering a pizza to some university students. Just as I was getting close to the destination, I ran out of gas. I had to call my manager for help. I finally delivered the pizza, which by now was cold and of course, free. The next night, when I came in to work, there was a message on the board saying to make sure that all drivers always had a full tank of gas. Thankfully he didn't name names, but I got the message.

I have also been a corner store clerk, hospital TV rental rep, assembly line worker, waitress, admin assistant, and even worked at Tim Horton's.

I have always had a lot of interests and trying new hobbies. It became a dream to someday take one of my hobbies and start a business and make money with something I loved. Once it was ceramics (yes, I could make lovely butter dishes and sell them), butter tarts (All day Friday making dozens of tarts, then going early in the morning to the local farmers market to sell), woodworking (I will make beautiful furniture, and sell them for fun and profit), dolls (I purchased a kit, which promised I just had to make these easy and much sought after dolls, and the company would sell them for me. I began to question this when I found the head was made of a block of 2/4, covered in a white sock).
I have been talked into all sorts of schemes, with promises of wonderful gains, if I just listened and put my trust and money on others who promised me wonders beyond imagination. My efforts included being a Tupperware dealer, an independent travel agent, health supplements and insurance. None of these were my cup of tea. Many years and MLM schemes later, I am a wiser, though somewhat financially challenged person.

When personal computers were just becoming the rage, I convinced myself that I should invest in one. I figured, after I learned how to turn it on, I could hire myself out to do word processing. I got my first client, a university student who was under pressure to get a paper in. As it turns out, I didn't know the program as well as I thought I did. Let's just say I didn't even charge the poor guy for the pitiful job I did.

Then a friend and I decided to try a mail order business. We found a guy who wanted us to promote his investment newsletter. We would get paid for every person we hooked. We got ourselves a joint bank account, put in an ad and waited for the money to roll in. I think we made one sale, which we never did get paid for.

Not to be quitters, we decided to put together a cook book. We created all sorts of recipes, and I used my computer to type them up. We sold about 300 copies, mostly to our mothers who bought them and gave them away to friends and relatives.

Although I did not success in having a profitable Word processing business, I did learn how to type well, so I managed to get a decent job as an admin assistant. One of my major tasked was to implement corrections to manuscripts. As I plodded through the documents in Word perfect, I saw a new desire and dream emerge from the recesses of my brain. I now wanted to become a desk top publisher. Yes, that was the ticket. All I had to do was become a DTPer, and all my problems would be solved. For a while, that is all I wanted to do. I talked about it, planned, dreamed, hoped.

Then, out of the blue, I was offered a job as Publications Manager. I didn't even know how to do it. You can imagine how I panicked. Well, I jumped in, learned as I ran and did a pretty good job, if you don't look at the time I put the satellite picture of earth on the cover upside down. I looked right to me, but my boss was not too impressed. After a few years of that, I again got tired and craved something new.

The next latest and greatest idea was to become a computer programmer. I had dabbled with it in the past, and really enjoyed it, but was not good enough to be hired. So I talked myself into taking a year off, going head over heels in debt, and becoming a geek. I got a job with the government. Yes, I was now programmer analyst. At first, the job was great. The project I was on was fascinating, and I learned so much through the experience. Then the project went into maintenance mode, which was soooo boring! Time to move on to something else.

I now wanted to become a professional public speaker. I wanted to travel the world talking for a living. This was perfect for me, as talking is one of my favorite things in the world. I approached someone in the field for advice. I waited with batted breath to hear her words of wisdom. My future was in her hands. She looked at me and said “Find something you like to talk about, and then find someone who is willing to pay you to talk about it.” What! That was it. That was all she had to share?

Though somewhat disappointed, I began to think about what my topic would be. I came up with the brilliant idea of Happiness. I decided to write a book on the topic. I figured that writing and research would do me good, and at the very least I would have something to leave my children, and the very best, I would be a published author (wait a minute, I already had published my cookbook, which was sitting and gathering dust on the book shelfs of all my mother's friends house)

Yes, Happiness was the ticket, the latest and greatest thing. I joined the Canadian Association of Professional Speakers (CAPS), read books, listened to countless tapes, was ready and raring to go. Through CAPS, I got an audition to a computer training company and got the job. I was now an independent contractor, teaching something I loved, learning the trade, being my own boss but what I really wanted to do was talk about happiness.

Eventually I did get a few gigs at meetings and a few conferences, even an national conference held in Toronto. I was on my way. Someday, I would finish that book, along with the Adirondack chair in the basement, the sweater for my nephew in the cupboard, and the dolls in the basement... Any day now, Ellen DeGeneres and Oprah will be calling me to come on their show. Hey, don't look at me that way, it could happen!

Either I would try something and fail at it, or succeed but then get tied of it and move on the next latest and greatest craze. After a while, I began to see myself as a failure. Why did I always seem to fall on my face? Why did I not focus on one thing and get it done? Why did I have such a short attention span? What was wrong with me? One of my friends went so far as to joke that he thought I may have a mental problem, though I am not sure if it was all in jest.

So you can see I was getting pretty down on myself over this and beginning to question myself and whether I was right in the head. I pictured myself one of those sad creatures that never gets anywhere in life, always dreaming schemes and the just failing. Like poor Ol' Gil Gunderson on the Simpsons.

And yet, now I look back over my life and no longer see any failure. I see a wonderful array of experiences and abilities built. I realize that my life is my own responsibly. I tried too hard and too long to find the fulfillment of my dreams in someone else's promises. I am learning to life on my own terms, be the best that I can be and embrace what some may consider my failures. They are part me, and nothing to be ashamed of.

My book is almost complete and all of these experiences have come together to help me to make this accomplishment. Being a speaker has given me the opportunity to write speeches about my life's ups and downs which has made me a better writer. The story of my “failures” have been great bases for the content of the book. Because I became a good typist, I was able to do the typing and editing myself. My experience on computers has helped me to be able to do my own layout, design my cover and other promotional items, created my own website and newsletter and build my own database to track expenses. My sales jobs have prepared me to find ways to promote it. Almost everything I have done over my life has prepared me to take full control of this project, and see it to completion.

Oh, and by the way, I have started a new business. I call it Sassy Sunflower Books. With everything I have learned about books and the printing business, I figured why not start my own micro publishing company that will help me promote my book, as well as give me a vehicle to help others. It is an exciting adventure.

I now see that my life was not a series of failures, but a wonderful journey towards this point of marvelous creation. I constantly celebrate with a heart full of joy and gratitude all that I have done and accomplished. It didn't matter if I didn't always get the job done, or that I can't stay doing one thing for long. I love to learn, experience and grow. That is who I am, and I rejoice in it. I can hardly wait to see what comes next.

Focus on What You Want

2008-10-23T20:25:00.000-07:00

My sister use to say I was too honest for my own good. I thought she was kidding me, but I am coming to believe there is some truth to it. Though I hate deceit and lying, that’s not say I have never done it. I have to admit I have and I am ashamed when I succumb to it.

The problem with being too honest is that I look at the good and bad in everything. When I have an experience, I will analyze it (often overanalyze it). I may say “That was fun, I enjoyed that because of this, and this and this”. However, I don’t stop there. The honest part of me kicks in and I start to vocalize what I didn’t like. So, for a period of time I am focusing on what I don’t want.

Honesty is a good thing, right? It most certainly is! So, when I talk like this, I like to think I am being totally honest about the situation, when maybe, the reality is that I am justifying the opportunity to complain.

There is a lot of talk about thinking positive, and focusing on what you want and not what you don’t want. Some people say that what you focus on expands, so if you focus on what is bad, you will get more of it. If you focus on what you want, you will get more of that. When I am stating, however innocently, about what I don’t like about a situation, then I am going to get more of it.

I have struggled with this part of me. How do I overcome this urge to share the negatives of my experience, and still be true to my honesty and integrity?

Reality is you can’t ignore the nasty in your life, or in the world around you, but you can take part in the solution. Though saying positive thoughts may not solve all your problems, they can help to shape your beliefs. If you have strong healthy beliefs about yourself and the world around you, your thoughts will reflect that. All of these concepts can work together to balance your mindset. If you have a positive mindset and outlook, you are in a better frame of mind and creativity to find solutions to the problems.

Once I went for training to develop my skills as an IT instructor. We had to do mini demos of our teaching style and technique. Afterwards, we were evaluated and feedback was given to help us improve our performance.

We were told that in giving feed back, we were to never tell the recipient what they did wrong or what we didn’t like. Instead, we were told that we had to start off by sharing with the individual what we liked best about what they did. After we shared as much as we could and helped encourage the person, we then were to proceed to the areas to improve.

It was to be stated in a positive manner. We were to say “Next time, how about trying this…” We would give the person an idea of how to take something we thought they could improve on, and do it better.

So instead of saying “You should not look at your notes so much”, we would say “Next time try looking at the audience more and maintaining good eye contact with them.”

This not only gave a positive swing to the feedback, but also makes it in the future, implying that there would be a next time. Instead of making the person feel bad by saying, “You looked at your notes too much”, which was in the past and points to what you felt they did wrong, we looked to the future with the expectation that they are doing well and next time would be better, as well as giving them some ideas about how to go about it.

It is more powerful to be for something, then against it. Mother Theresa was once asked to join and anti-war rally. She responded no. She then continued that if they were ever going to have a peace rally, she would be there.

I got thinking about all this, and how it could be applied to my daily life. I want to think positively, I want to change my beliefs, and I want to focus on what I want, not what I don’t want. At the same time, I don’t want to turn a blind eye and ignore what bothers me, because it bothers me for a reason, and needs to be addressed.

Through using the evaluation technique I learned, I can evaluate my experiences with honesty. I can state what I really liked about the experience or event, and when I get to the parts I didn’t like, and can find a forward looking way of looking at it. Instead of saying, “I didn’t like the way I handled ____…,” I will say “Next time, I am going to be more sensitive and thoughtful, as I …”.

If you have a hard time thinking of an alternative course of action, express it as you would like it to be. Michael Losier, author of “The Law of Attraction” (www.lawofattractionbook.com) says that in order get yourself into the positive vibrations, you should make statements like this “I love knowing that my ideal ___ is … “, or “I’m excited at the thought of… “ or “I love how it feels when I… “. Saying these statements allows you to be honest and at the same time, focusing on what you want to bring into your life.

Or, how about playing make believe. Create a Vision Book. Mike Dooley, author of the book “Notes from the Universe” (www.tut.com) suggests you create a book and fill it with pictures of places and things you want in your life. Write letters of thank you yourself, creating a mindset of what it would feel to have had the think you want already accomplished.

For instance, if you want to take part in a play, write a letter to yourself from the manager of the play, thanking you for all your hard work, and how your participation make the play such a success.

Fill it with all sorts of imagery of how you want your life to be, things that make you feel good and then look at it every day for at least 10 minutes and day dream. Make sure it stirs and excites you with the joy when you look at it. Keep it fresh, often replacing items that no longer ignite your joy with something new.

Not only will this keep your outlook and mindset positive and happy, but it will help you to move closer to achieving you goals.

These techniques may seem too simple to really be effective, but often it is those simple concepts that are the most powerful. So next time you are tempted to be negative, take a look at the thought. Your statement will reflect something in you or your life that you don’t like or don’t want. Stop and rephrase it to say what you would prefer to happen. Concentrate on thinking of ways you can make it happen. State in the future, the next time scenario and watch how your life changes.

A Key to Happiness - Stop Trying

2008-06-27T20:23:00.000-07:00

I am a firm believer that the key to happiness is in realizing you have the power to choose happiness. You don’t have to just accept that your life sucks and there is nothing you can do about it. Instead, you can take action and find ways to improve your thoughts, actions and circumstance.

Having said that, I realized lately that I have fallen into the trap of trying too hard. I want to succeed in business so I can have plenty of money to pursue my dreams and goals as I see fit. That is just fine. The problem is that lately I am seeing myself get frustrated because things don’t work out exactly as I want them to work out. Fear has been taking over.

Last weekend, I had a serious heart to heart with myself. I made the decision to stop trying so hard, to stop striving. I am still going to work hard to accomplish my dreams, but I am going to live more in the moment. No, even better, I am going to choose to live in the moment. So, instead of “doing” things to achieve my success, I just stopped. I just sat down and enjoyed watching the wind on the flowers in my front garden. I took the time to go for a walk, to read a good book, to be happy in the moment. I felt peace come over me again. This week has been more joyful and relaxed then I have had for a long time.

Appreciation is one of the best tools I know to help me let go of the future, and be present. I smile and start to list all of the wonderful things I have in my life. My family, friends, opportunities, health. There is always something new to be added to the list. This may be a cliche concept, but it does work. You start to list them, and you can’t help but smile.

Forgiveness is the Key to Happiness

2008-06-16T20:21:00.000-07:00

I am continually reminded about how important it is to forgive. It is one of the most powerful ways to free youself from the pain that other may cause you to feel.

But it can be so hard to do, or at least, it seems hard. And we are so afraid to do it, because by doing so, we think we are going to let someone get away with “it”, whatever it is.

When I was a little girl, someone came to visit my mother. I was a talkative child, and while I was chattering away, and my mother was out of the room, this woman turned to me and basically told me that it was more important for her to be able to talk to my mother and not me. I know that isn’t what she really said, but that is how my little head interpreted it. I was crushed.

It wasn’t that long ago, that I still felt the anger and pain that she caused. Years after this woman had passed away, I was still raising my fist at her, yelling, “How dare you!!”. I knew deep down that I should let it get to me so, but I just couldn’t shake it. I was angry at myself for being so petty and small, and wanted to let it go.

I remember I was driving a long distance, and had a long heart to heart chat with myself. I just talked and talked, and tried to look at all the angles. Did I remember the story correctly, or did I just misunderstand the woman. Even if she did say that, I tried to put myself in her shoes.

After looking at many angles, I finally was able to let it go. I forgave her, and also, I forgave myself.

Forgiveness is not about letting someone get away with anything. Its about finding freedom through forgiveness. It’s about freeing yourself to live the best possible life.

Who do you need to forgive?

You Deserve the Best!

2008-05-13T20:55:00.000-07:00

Isn't it nice to know that we do indeed deserve the best that life has to offer?! The problem is we often don't give ourselves permission to accept it. So often, we short change ourselves.

Why is it that we are so down on ourselves? It may because we feel that we don't deserve to have good things happen to us, so we don't allow the good things to come.

Deserving has the connotation that you have done something that entitles you to receive something in return. You do something bad, and therefore deserve punishment. Or maybe something bad happens and you are left wondering what you
did to make it happen, that you didn’t deserve it. Other times, if something wonderful happens, you may feel humbled because you feel you did nothing to necessitate it.

Deserving really has nothing to do with actions. Deserving has everything to do with being. We don't deserve something because we have done something good or bad. The
common thread in the dictionaries for the word 'Deserve' is say that to that the word means to "be worthy of" or just "to be worthy". In my mind, something of worth is something of value. So, to be deserving, means you need to be something of value. What could be more valuable then each of us, then our own individual existence?

The problem is, that so often our behaviour is not always be up to snuff. We get confused with the things we do equating who we are.

Now, I am not condoning that we can do what ever we want, no matter what the consequences are. If our actions hurt others, we are only hurting ourselves. But no matter what we do, it does not take away from our own intrinsic value. No matter what we do, we are still of value, to ourselves and the rest of the world.

When we recognize our value, see that we are of worth and open ourselves to receiving the best that life has to offer, the result is that we will become the best we can be, which in turn with make us happier and more fulfilled,
which in turn will flow out to those around us.

Feeling undeserving of the best is accepting that you are less then you can be, it is a false humility and in my mind, one of the worst behaviours you can possibly exhibit.

As Lanie Pambid says, "every human being is deserving of the best that life has to offer; love, care, respect, consideration ... The key is to understand that this abundance can be freely available to all."

Expecting the best in our lives and as a result becoming the best, will help us to overcome the worst in us. It's time to allow ourselves to be open to all that life has to offer us.

It may be because we feel that we don't deserve to have good things happen to us, so we don't allow the good things to come.

Why is it that we are so down on ourselves? What is at the root of feeling like crap.

It's time to allow ourselves to be open to all that life has to offer us.

Agreeing to Choose Happiness

2008-04-30T15:46:00.000-07:00

"This is the way I am. I’ve always been this way, and I can't change". I’ve heard this from many people who think that they have no power over their own happiness. They have been that way for so long that they think that they were just born that way. They believe they have no ability to change. But, this simply is not true. The ability to change how we think, act and feel is in all of us. We just need to become aware of our beliefs, figure out if these beliefs are in our best interest, and if not, take action to re-create the belief.

You Agreed to Your Reality
As we grow up, we are taught how to believe and behave in order to be a good person, or successful, or acceptable or lovable. When we believe an idea, we have in reality agreed to it. On some level, we have said yes to that idea. It becomes our reality. But just because we say yes, does not mean that it’s true or even healthy. Many of these ideas and concepts have validity, and should be considered, but we need to examine what we agree to and figure out what is truly valid, and what’s not. We need to agree that we have choices, and then find the choices that will lead to happiness.

I use to agree to the idea that I should take things that other people think about me to heart, so much so that I would allow myself to be upset if they didn’t like me. I was subconsciously walking around saying to myself "I agree to be hurt by others by taking everything they say personally". I just didn’t know it.

It's Their Problem, Not Yours
Then a wise friend said to me, "Donna, if they don’t like you, it’s their problem, not yours". That struck home. I became aware what I was agreeing to, and decided to change it. I rarely take things personally anymore. It is such freedom.

What Do You Believe About Yourself
Make a list of things you believe about yourself. Go down the list and ask yourself, do I agree, deep down in my heart of hearts that this statement is true? Does this statement empower or disable me? If you answer is the latter, or it the statement makes you uncomfortable, you may be agreeing with something that is false.

If the statement is not in your best interest, decide to disagree with it. Make a new agreement. Change that statement into something that empowers you. Decide, right now, to no longer waste energy by agreeing to a lie. Create a new way of viewing yourself, one that is positive, productive and creative.

You Have the Power
Realize that not only do you have the right to create you own reality, to choose what you are going to agree to about yourself and your purpose for living, but you have the power to do it. Yes, even you! In addition to that, you have a responsibility to do so, to live the most fulfilling life you can, not just for your own pleasure, but for those around you. The greater a life you lead, the better the world will be.

Unless you make that choice and take the effort to develop yourself to become the best possible "you" you can be, you will stay right where you are. Nothing will change.

Happiness is a choice, not a chance. You just need to ensure that you are agreeing with true statements about yourself and your world. It is all up to you.

2008-04-29T08:08:00.000-07:00

What if…?

Here is a question we often ask ourselves.

What if… I fail?
What if… I look stupid?
What if…and the list goes on.

How often do you let the "What if’s" from stopping you in your tracks.

How about saying,
"What if I take action and go for my dreams, no matter what?
What if I succeed!"I know what you're thinking.

Your saying to yourself, "but I don’t deserve to have what I want or to achieve my dreams". Be honest now, that little voice is whispering that into you head right now, isn’t it. I’m going to ask you a simple question, and I want an honest answer. Why not? Tell your little voice to shut up. Put it in it's place and say "No more what if's or I don’t deserves forme". Train the voice to say "I choose to succeed in my goals, and I do deserve it"!

Last year, I was in South Carolina, walking along the beach. I was having a long heart to heart talk with myself. Though my business allowed me to travel, I came to the conclusion that I was not happy with some of the things that I was doing, and needed to make a change. One thing was very clear to me, though. I loved to travel and wanted to continue to find ways to do so, and still create my wealth. I did not want to travel if the circumstances for it caused me to be too tired and frustrated to enjoy it.

It was there and then that I decided that I was going to make it a goal to travel on my own terms. In fact, I renewed my resolve to live totally and fully on my terms. I was going to go where I wanted to go, and do it at least once a month.

How do I do this? Where would I get the money? Well, first I decided I was going to do it, then I created a financial plan where I could put money aside to do it. We always have money for that which we truly value. Then, I opened myself to receive the opportunities that would allow me to do it.

The results have been amazing. I have succeeded in doing something every month, from traveling to Toronto to visit friends and family, to going to New Orleans, Mexico, the East Coast twice, as well as camping and participating in a national conference and more. Thinking and planning are important, but just as important is taking action. I talked to others about my dreams and goals, I took training to learn what I needed to do. I stepped out of my comfort zone and took chances. As a result , I have been able to find clients and business opportunities that are inline with my personal beliefs, goals and values. I have hooked with a phenomenal personal development company that will touch millions of lives (www.abundanz4u.com), and I have also become a travelagent http://www.protravelnet.com/havefunwilltravel),which will open another door for my travel dreams.

I continue to sharpen my skills as a speaker and clarify my focus of my goals and desires. I have gotten better at my crafts, and am in more demand, and have a greater joy in what I am doing. I have changed my focus to allow opportunities to come into my life that will pay me to travel, and again, on my terms.

My future travel plans include going to Dominican Republic, Victoria BC, Calgary, the East Coast (of course!) and I also plan to go to Ireland and England with my mother and sister. If I can achieve my goals and desires, so can you. It just goes to show that you are the one in control of your dreams and your decisions. Have a long hard heart to heart with yourself, and find out what brings you joy, create your plan of action and go for it. Don't let the "what if's", the "I don't deserves" and so called "reality" stop you.

Think Positive?

2008-01-18T17:48:00.000-08:00

There has been much written and said about the power of positive thought. Some extol its virtues, while others say that you can't just think yourself to fame, fortune and happiness. These people look down their noses at such concepts, stating that you can’t just think yourself out of problems, or that "Self Help", especially Positive Thinking is bunk, the haven for con artists and other nasty characters.

When all is said and done, you are what you think, and only you can decide what that is. Positive thinking will not magically solve your problems. It is only the first step. In order for it to work, you must take action. Let it inspire you to take the necessary actions to achieve your goals.

Whatever you situation, you need to be realistic. Some things may just be beyond your grasp. Being positive means looking honestly at your life and finding the good, no matter how bad. It is finding ways to deal with the pain that is sure to come your way.

Norman Vincent Peale made his mark by preaching the Power of Positively. He is best known for his book "The Power ofPositive Thinking". Though some people think that this book teaches you to just ignore the evil of the world, think happy thoughts and pretend it’s not there; this is far fromthe true. Instead, Peale says that he wrote the book, 'with deep concern for the pain, difficulty and struggle of human existence. '

It’s so easy to get caught up in negative thinking. You see the news and hear all of the horrible and stupid things people are doing to themselves and to each others, and you want to scream. But by trying to create some sort of meaning out of all the mess, by focusing on the wonderful that is in our lives, by training our thoughts to see the possible, not just the pain, and taking action, we can rise above it. I am positive you will do great things with your life, if you choose.

Freedom through Forgiveness

2005-07-26T14:11:00.000-07:00

Volume: 1 Issue: 8

Editor's Notes

Once as a small child, a friend of the family made a comment to me which really hurt. It was a small incident, but to the eyes of a child, it was traumatic. I carried that anger and hurt well into my adult years.

When I grew up, I realized that I needed to let it go, but I couldn't. I was still angry that this person, a pillar of the community, could have been so mean. What right did she have to say what she had said? I still felt the sting.

The thing is, it wasn't that I couldn't forgive. It was because I didn't want to forgive. Mentally I knew I would be better off to let it go, but I felt at a loss as to how to do. I wanted the world to feel sorry for me, to
say, "poor Donna, this is not fair". I wanted to hold on to my status as a victim. This is a trap.

Though we may have a reason, full justification for our feelings, to allow ourselves to be a victim will only destroy us in the end. The answer is to find the strength and rise above our "rights" and forgive. Then the healing
can begin.

As with everything, everyone has their own ways and means to deal with things. The important thing is that we make the effort to do so. But I never said it was easy. As Mahatma Gandhi said "The weak can never forgive.
Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong."

For me, I finally came to the decision that I no longer wanted to feel the pain anymore. I no longer wanted to allow it in my life, to give it permission to exist. I wanted to be free. What I did was I had a long heart to heart, with myself. I tried to fully understand the event,
why the person said what she had said, that maybe she didn't understand what she had done, that maybe I misunderstood her words. I worked hard to try and understand both of the participants without judgement, myself for being over-sensitive and maybe blowing things out of proportion and her for being insensitive and seemingly selfish.

It didn't really matter if I came to a full understanding of what really happened, I just needed to talk it through. Finally, after much self-talk, I was able to let it go. I forgave her. It didn't matter that she wasn't there to hear the words. It didn't matter that it seemed that she had gotten away with something. It didn't matter if it was real or not. What mattered to me at that point in time was that I was finally free.

People are often afraid to forgive because the think that they are letting the perpetrator to get away with it. But they don't understand what forgiveness is. Forgiveness is a method to heal. When you have been hurt, you are wounded. The wound needs to be treated in order to heal. Forgiveness is medical treatment for you soul. Forgiveness is taking control of you life and not giving into the fallacy of victim hood. Forgiveness is empowerment.

As Christopher Stewart says in today's article, "The first step toward forgiveness begins by recognizing that you are much larger than just your wounded persona."

Here are some ideas that may help you to forgive:

1) Acknowledge the pain
2) Examine the reason you are hurt
3) Make a decision to do something about it
4) Give up your right to be right
5) Create a reason to forgive

Forgive and set your soul free.

Funny Business

Forgiveness
The preacher's, Sunday sermon was Forgive Your Enemies.

He asked, how many have forgiven their enemies?

About half held up their hands.

He then repeated his question.

Now about 80% held up their hands.

He then repeated his question again.

All responded, except one elderly lady.

"Mrs. Jones, are you not willing to forgive your enemies?"
asked the preacher.

"I don't have any." she replied.

"Mrs. Jones, that is very unusual. How old are you?" asked
the preacher.

"Ninety-three." she replied.

"Mrs. Jones, please come down in front and tell the congregation how a person cannot have an enemy in the world." asked the preacher.

The little sweetheart of a lady tottered down the aisle, and said, "It's easy, I just outlived them."

Quality Quote

Sincere forgiveness isn't colored with expectations that the other person apologize or change. Don't worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them. Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time-just like it does for you and me.
Sara Paddison.

Always forgive your enemies--nothing annoys them so much.
Oscar Wilde.

Happiness Tip

It is not easy to forgive, but is is totally necessary. When you a burdened by hate, anger and bitterness, you can never fully heal. Create an image in your mind of those that have hurt you and imagine good things happening to them. The more positive intentions you wish for them, the lighter your burden. You are not rewarding them, you are freeing yourself.

Article

Medical Intuitive Looks at Forgiveness

by Christopher Stewart

Healing and forgiveness work together. When you forgive Yourself or someone else, you end the pattern of energy that binds you to the injured aspect of your self. Then the wound can heal, and you stop losing energy.

Forgiveness is about having more energy. When there is forgiveness, someone's behaviour or a painful memory no longer has the power to cause your awareness to collapse into it. For example, say that your father drank too much or was withdrawn and unavailable during your childhood,
causing you to feel angry, abandoned and unloved.

Forgiveness exists when your heart no longer closes and your energy doesn't contract when you are around him. You have "given away in advance" or fore-given the emotional reaction that usually leads you into anger, or a victim stance. The energy is released before it has even become a
reaction.

This freedom is not detachment or indifference; it's not immunity to feelings. You may feel the feelings and they can still hurt, but it passes through you because you're no longer identified with your wounded persona. This takes real self-knowledge; you have to work on understanding your
own reactions. Forgiveness means you have become grounded in a deeper recognition of who you really are. And the moment the reaction ends in you, something changes in the other person, whether it's your father, mother, spouse — these are the people who can hurt you the most, and who you can hurt the most — but as you forgive, they begin to have more freedom too. So there is more energy, more relationship to your true self, and then healing begins at every level. When forgiving someone close to you, the whole pattern of who you are radically changes.

The first step toward forgiveness begins by recognizing that you are much larger than just your wounded persona.

You have the power to stop giving yourself away to emotional contraction — the sinking or exploding feeling, the tightening in the body, collapsing into anger or worthlessness. When you contract, and then react like this,
you are already the victim. However, when you begin to take conscious responsibility for your own suffering instead of contracting and reacting — you meet this suffering consciously, instead of blaming anyone else—and this conscious suffering gradually leads you to disengage from the whole structure of victim hood and woundedness.

You can try to make yourself forgive through an act of will. But when forgiveness starts as an idea, it may seem noble and wise, but it is still a defence against the painful feelings. And forgiveness is not a defence; it is a kind of enlightenment. When something is truly forgiven, there is no longer a trace inside your psyche that hooks you back into the pain and reaction. When that happens, those around you heal too. Energetic patterns link us to one another in relationships- especially in families. When a pattern no longer has any place inside you, it ceases to have energy in others, and they begin to change in response. This is one of the ways that love truly heals.

© 2005 Christopher Stewart

Christopher Stewart is a Medical Intuitive assisting others in their healing process. His work is compassionate, uplifting and empowering. You can visit Christopher's website at http://www.clairvoyantguide.com for further information and to schedule a private consultation. You can
also look for frequent updates to his blog at:
http://intuitiveliving.blogspot.com/

Publisher's Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/

Interesting Links

Forgiveness. . . What's it for?
http://www.celebratelove.com/forgive.htm

Forgiveness is a Bold Choice
http://www.heartlight.org/articles/200310/20031003_forgiveness.html

The Art of Forgiveness
http://www.dailyom.com/articles/2005/408.html

Odds and Ends

You can view past issues of "Strategies4Happiness" at www.strategies4happiness.com/archive.html.

If you like this newsletter, please share it by forwarding it to others and letting them know how much you like it. If you are not already a member, you can sign up at http://www.strategies4happiness.com.

Check out these books that are sure to give you loads of insight and ideas to help you find your happiness potential! http://www.strategies4happiness.com/books.html

If, when you are attempting to click on a link it doesn't work, copy and paste the link into your browser or email address line.

© 2005 Donna Hedley and Strategies4Happiness,
All rights reserved Worldwide.

The Happiness Habit

2005-07-13T11:00:00.000-07:00

Volume: 1 Issue: 6

Editor's Notes

Here's a habit you don't want to kick. Happiness. If you don't already possess this habit, guess what, you can start to develop it now.

How can Happiness be a Habit you ask? Take a look at how the website Dictionary.com defines habit:

a. A recurrent, often unconscious pattern of behavior that is acquired through frequent repetition.
b. An established disposition of the mind or character.

In other words, it is something we do without thinking. It happens automatically. We develop a habit by "frequent repetition". Even more important, it's "an established disposition of the mind or character". Happiness is not the feeling, the buzz that comes with a pleasant event. It
is a mindset, a way of thinking. Since we have total control over the way we think, then we have control of our emotions. We can develop a positive happy mindset by cultivating happy habits.

Today's article "How To Develop The Habit Of Happiness" will show you how. The author, Randy Gilbert, talks about three specific attitudes or "disposition of the mind" that you need to cultivate in order to develop the Habit of Happiness. They are "Gratitude", "Forgiveness", and "Living Your Calling".

It's critical that we develop the Habit of Happiness. Why? Take a look at the events of this past week. London has been hit by terrorists. 51 people have died, many others have suffered much. It's at times like this, that it is so important to possess the Habit of Happiness. I was encouraged in reading that the day of the attack, people were still going about their business, socializing, and making it clear that in spite of the actions of others, they were determined to show that it was "business as usual". They were not going to let the bombing stop them from living. To do so would be to admit that the terrorist had won.

I don't make light of the gravity of what has happened, nor do I say that we should just brush it under the rug and pretend it didn't happen. Those that did it should be brought to justice. What I do say is that it is imperative that, despite the horror, despite the cruel and incompressible motives and actions of these individuals, we need to, now more then ever, appreciate what we have (Gratitude), learn to not let these acts control us through anger and hatred (Forgiveness), and to continue to find clarity of purpose and live that purpose everyday (Live your Calling). If we are able to do this, we will be the victors.

If Happiness is not a habit with you, I challenge you to start today. Begin to incorporate these ideas into your life. They say it takes at least 30 days to develop a new habit. Start now, and commit to showing appreciation, forgiveness and pursuing your passion in some form or another, each day for the next 30 days. If you do, by the end of that time, these things will start to become second nature.

For more information about these and other "habits" you can develop, take a look a "The Strategies" at http://www.strategies4happiness.com/strategies.php. This list is developing and growing and getting better all the time.

So, until next time, have fun and think happy.

Donna

Funny Business

A doctor made it his regular habit to stop off at a bar for a hazelnut daiquiri on his way home. The bartender knew of his habit, and would always have the drink waiting at precisely 5:03 p.m. One afternoon, as the end of the work day approached, the bartender was dismayed to find that he
was out of hazlenut extract. Thinking quickly, he threw together a daiquiri made with hickory nuts and set it on the bar. The doctor came in at his regular time, took one sip of the drink and exclaimed, "This isn't a hazelnut daiquiri!" "No, I'm sorry", replied the bartender, "it's a
hickory daiquiri, doc."

Quality Quote

The beginning of a habit is like an invisible thread, but every time we repeat the act we strengthen the strand, add to it another filament, until it becomes a great cable and binds us irrevocably in thought and act.
Orison Swett Marden

Happiness is a thing to be practiced, like the violin.
John Lubbock

Happiness Tip

Develop the habit of being aware of your state of
Happiness. Often we are not even aware that things are not
quite right with our over all state of mind, we just feel
blah, and don't know why. But when we are aware of the
fact things are just not right, we can examine out
attitudes, and we can take the necessary actions towards
overcoming the problem, before it overcomes us.

Article

How To Develop The Habit Of Happiness

by Randy Gilbert
I've seen a lot of the world and from what I can tell, "people are the same everywhere." We all want and need happiness in our lives. We long for the feelings of contentment and well-being.

In one of my courses I make a bold promise to "double your happiness." Although I've been warned not to make claims that people find hard to believe (even if they're true)there are definite strategies that I've used with great success.

You are in complete control your level of happiness. I'm not the only one who believes that way. In fact Abraham Lincoln said, "A man can be just about as happy as he makes up his mind to be."

According to Dr. Martin Seligman, a respected psychologist and author of "Authentic Happiness," your level of happiness is a combination of three things: your innate level (your set range), the situation your in (your circumstances), and your voluntary control. The third factor is most important, because it proves scientifically that you can increase your level of happiness by our own thoughts and actions.

Seligman says you can "voluntary control" your level of happiness and set it higher by three major factors: gratitude, forgiveness, and living your calling. This might not sound profound, but it is powerful when you learn how to think and act differently.

How Happy Do You Want To Be?

By being proactive you can be as happy as you choose. The following three strategies have worked for me and I'm confident they will work for you too as you make them a part of your life.

Have an Attitude of Gratitude

I believe having an attitude of gratitude is the first habit that everyone who wishes to enjoy success and abundance should acquire. It is simple and easy and very effective. There isn't any situation that is so bad that there isn't something to be thankful for.

You can form this wonderful habit by thinking of things you are grateful for and then either writing them down or expressing them out loud, or both. It can be as simple as making a list of the things that gave you a lift throughout the day. A gratitude journal is a great way for documenting
the good things that happen to you, including your accomplishments.

Many people experience the good feelings of gratitude once a year during the Thanksgiving Holiday. But good feelings of optimism will grow to a lasting contentment as you make being thankful a part of your daily routine.

Forgive Yourself and Others

The act of forgiveness is incredibly powerful. Many people don't realize how much they stand to lose by not forgiving, and how much to gain by setting themselves and other free. It's a gift that when bestowed, keeps on giving and giving back.

The strategy I learned is to list people who I've felt had hurt me or disappointed me in some way and then to intentional acknowledge that they did the best they could with the knowledge they had at that time.

It's best to start with people who are close to you. Don't let misunderstandings of the past chain you in mediocrity and keep you from achieving your dreams. It might be a difficult lesson, but you have absolutely nothing to gain by not forgiving.

The habit of forgiveness can be formed by daily acknowledging that you have done your best and so have others. Then work on eliminating the "should haves" in your life. They are negative judgments that almost always form negative feelings and unhappiness.

Live Your Calling

The happiest people I've ever met are those who are doing the things they love doing. When you have the confidence of doing what you were destined to do you will gain a power to overcome life's problems.

James Michener said, "For this is the journey that men make: to find themselves. If they fail in this, it doesn't matter much what else they find."

You have built-in strengths and when you focus on improving them you will gain a feeling of being in sync with life. You will find happiness by helping others to find happiness and you will do that best by doing what you love to do.

You can proactively increase your happiness by being thankful, forgiving yourself and others, and by living your calling. Follow these strategies and you will increase your happiness (yes, even double it). None of these strategies cost any money and they are worth more than what gold can
purchase.

Randy Gilbert is the best-selling author of "Success Bound:Breaking Free of Mediocrity" http://hop.clickbank.net/hop.cgi?kgs03/rgilbert Co-host of "The Inside Success Show" the fastest growing success talk show. http://www.TheInsideSuccessShow.com Creator of "Proactive Success: The Amazing NEW Science Of Personal Achievement" http://www.DrProactive.com. Get his free newsletter: ProactiveSuccess@postmaster-email.com

Interesting Links

Michael Anthony's Free e-book "How to be Happy and Have Fun Changing the World"

http://www.howtobehappy.org/free-happy-e-book.html

The Happiness Hike
An original method for obtaining all of your dreams, finding contentment and living life without fear - happiness included.

http://www.geocities.com/716948/hh/hhtext-home.html

Articles on Happiness by David G. Myers http://www.davidmyers.org/Brix?pageID=47

Odds and Ends

You can view past issues of "Strategies4Happiness" at www.strategies4happiness.com/archive.html.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If you like this newsletter, please share it by forwarding it to others and letting them know how much you like it. If you are not already a member, you can sign up at http://www.strategies4happiness.com.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Looking for a Dynamic Speaker for you next meeting or conference? Want a workshop that will get people motivated and excited? Well, look no further. As a motivational speaker, my message is positive, informative and practical.

I am available for speeches, workshops and training. For more information, go to http://www.strategies4happiness.com/workshops.htm or e-mail me at mailto:donna@strategies4happiness.com.

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Check out these books that are sure to give you loads of insight and ideas to help you find your happiness potential!http://www.strategies4happiness.com/books.html

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

If, when you are attempting to click on a link it doesn't work, copy and paste the link into your browser or email address line.

© 2005 Donna Hedley and Strategies4Happiness,
All rights reserved Worldwide.

Choices

2005-06-18T17:52:00.000-07:00

Editor's Notes

"This is the way I am. I have always been this way, and I can't change". I have heard this from many people who think that they have no power over their own happiness. They have been that way for so long, and they think that they were just born that way, that they have no ability to change. But, this simply is not true. The ability to change how we think, act and feel is in all of us. We just need to believe and take action.

As we grow up, we are taught how to believe and behave in order to be a good person, or a success, or acceptable or lovable. When we believe an idea, we have in reality agreed to it. On some level, we have said yes to that idea. It becomes our reality. But just because we say yes, does not mean that it is true or even healthy for us. Many of these ideas and concepts have validity, and should be considered, but we need to examine what we agree to and figure out what is truly valid, and what is not. We need to agree that we have choices, and then find the choices that will lead to happiness.

The feature article, "Today I choose... " by Bill Marshall continues on this theme. It suggests that you develop a list of affirmations by starting with the words "Today I choose", and then fill in the blank.

And I am so glad you have chosen to join me today. I hope the last two weeks have been full of joy and adventure. Write me and let me know what it was.

The latest and greatest news is that I am officially announcing the publication of my book, "Strategies4Happiness". I plan to have it finished and published by December 2005. Write me if you wish to be put on the waiting list to be notified when the book is ready.

This book is where it all began. I started to write a book because I decided it was an activity that would help me to pull out of the pit of misery I was in. The book was a way for me to take action through writing and researching practical ideas and concepts to build happiness. I wasn't concerned if I ever published it, I just wanted to do something concrete to get me out of my slump. But it will be published. It is so exciting to see the book take shape and become a reality.

And because of the book, I was inspired to embark on a Speaking Career, to build this website, and create this newsletter. I hope this story will inspire you to find your dream and choose to pursue it.

Happiness is a choice, not a chance. We just need to choose to agree that we have the power to make the necessary choices that will lead to happiness. It is all up to you.

Donna

Funny Business

Choice of Career

An older couple had a son, who was still living with his parents. The parents were a little worried, as the son was still unable to decide about his career path ... so they decided to do a small test.

They took a ten-dollar bill, a Bible, and a bottle of whiskey, and put them on the front hall table. Then they hid, hoping he would think they weren't at home.

The father told the mother, "If he takes the money he will be a businessman, if he takes the Bible he will be a priest - but if he takes the bottle of whiskey, I'm afraid our son will be a drunkard."

So the parents took their place in the nearby closet and waited nervously. Peeping through the keyhole they saw their son arrive home. He saw the note they had left, saying they'd be home later. Then, he took the 10-dollar bill, looked at it against the light, and slid it in his pocket.

After that, he took the Bible, flicked through it, and took it also.

Finally, he grabbed the bottle, opened it, and took an appreciative whiff to be assured of the quality. Then he left for his room, carrying all the three items.

The father slapped his forehead, and said: "Darn, it's even worse than I ever imagined..."

"What do you mean?" his wife inquired.

"Our son is going to be a politician!" replied the concerned father.

Quality Quote

Each morning when I open my eyes I say to myself: I, not events, have the power to make me happy or unhappy today. I can choose which it shall be. Yesterday is dead, tomorrow hasn't arrived yet. I have just one day, today, and I'm going to be happy in it.
Groucho Marx

Every choice carries a consequence. For better or worse, each choice is the unavoidable consequence of its predecessor. There are not exceptions. If you can accept that a bad choice carries the seed of its own punishment, why not accept the fact that a good choice yields desirable fruit?
Gary Ryan Blair (Mind Munchies : A Delicious Assortment of Brain Snacks!)

I discovered I always have choices and sometimes it's only a choice of attitude.
Judith M. Knowlton

Happiness Tip

Happiness comes through a series of choices. First, you must decide to allow yourself to be happy. Next you must decide you want to be happy. Then you must decide that you can be happy. After that, you must find the ways to obtain happiness, and decide on the options you have. And finally, the most important and perhaps hardest step, decide to take the actions necessary to implement the options you have chosen to achieve happiness and do it.

Article

Today I choose...

by Bill Marshall

Here is a great way to create affirmations that may be helpful to you. Here's how it works:

You start off the affirmation with "Today I choose..." then fill in a quality or thought habit that you want to condition into your thinking. Then repeat it often during the course of the day, especially when you are about to make a decision or engage in a behavior that is directly related to what you intend to create. Let it act as a compass to guide you so that you keep moving in a straight line directly towards your goals regardless of what others may do.

So, for example, you might say, "Today I choose to be wealthy." Here are some sample times when you may want to repeat this to yourself:

When you make deposits to your accumulation plan (I like the word "accumulation" much better than "savings").

When you spend money. I use this to check myself to see if I'm turning cash into trash, buying a doodad, or buying a potential asset.

When you think you have to watch some television to unwind (instead of studying to be wealthy).

As I'm listening to a success oriented audio book or studying financial intelligence.

As I go to work.

As I research assets to purchase.

When I even think about using a credit card or some other type of debt.

I'm sure there are all kinds of other situations where I repeat it. What this does is set the direction of my thought to focus on activities that lead to wealth. I'm consciously choosing my thoughts rather than simply walking around unconscious of my thoughts and actions. It helps me think through the consequences of my actions in advance so that I make better choices.

Sometimes for variety, I may replace the word wealth with other variations, such as:

Today I choose to accumulate wealth.
Today I choose to be financially intelligent.
Today I choose to create massive abundance.
Today I choose to spend my money wisely.
Today I choose to live debt free (that is no bad debt).

You get the idea.

This formula also works for far more than accumulating money. Let's say you need to improve your health or to loose weight. How about:

Today I choose to be healthy.
Today I choose to be thin.

Here is why this affirmation formula is so powerful. Once you reach the age where you can start to make choices, the quality of your life is largely governed by the choices you make for yourself. Every choice you make (either consciously or unconsciously) is a cause set in motion. If you want to improve the quality of your life, it starts by improving the quality of your thoughts and your choices. If you are not satisfied with the quality of your life, it won't change until you improve the quality of your thoughts and your choices.

This affirmation acts as a pattern interrupt to help you think through your action to make certain it is consistent with the choice you say you are making. This is why it is important to literally say the words, not just think them.

They also help you make better choices, because they are almost always going to be positive. Who in their right mind would say:

Today I choose to be poor.
Today I choose to accumulate massive debt.
Today I choose to be fat.
Today I choose to be unhappy.
Today I choose to be rude and obnoxious.

I cringed even as I typed the words. I think back to a commercial I saw a while back that showed different children saying things like: "When I grow up I want to be under appreciated" or "I want to be downsized." I can't remember what the commercial was for, but it was very funny. Why? Because they were so serious--like they were saying "When I grow up, I want to be a doctor." The statements were obviously meant to be ridiculous.

But...how many of us unconsciously say these very things to ourselves by our negative thoughts, self-image, and actions-our choices?

Another reason this formula is so powerful is that it focuses your mind on "Today." Today, right now, is all we really have. You can't take actions in the past. You can only plan for the future (and planning is important--see www.poweraffirmations.com to review my personal planning process). But we can only make our choices and take action in the moment--now. Today. How many times did you plan to take a certain action, but didn't for one reason or another? That happens to all of us all the time--often for good reasons. While you must learn from the past and plan for the future, you have to live in the moment. In many ways, "time" is an illusion.

So, resolve to do to live consciously. Don't just make better choices, make outstanding choices. Here's a great thing about choice: as you consciously make outstanding choices, you have the added benefit of rejecting poor or mediocre choices without any extra effort. As these outstanding choices begin to stack on top of each other, it won't be long before you begin to see massive improvements in your life.

Here are some affirmations to choose from: Today I choose...

to be wealthy.
to live debt free.
to live an abundant life.
to be outstanding.
to be successful.
to buy assets.
to be healthy.
to be happy.
to be grateful.
to be an outstanding _________ (singer, business man or
woman, accountant, etc.)
to be courteous and kind.
to be a good driver.
to be neat and organized.
to live at peace with myself and others.
to forgive others.
to be persistent.
to be an outstanding community leader.

As you can see, the list is endless and the formula is simple. Use it to start making better choices today!

About The Author

Copyright © 2005 Bill Marshall - All rights reserved. Feel free to republish this article provided you include the copyright information and the weblinks where possible.

For practical self-improvement tips, visit www.poweraffirmations.com
Get my new free e-book, "Power Affirmations: Power Positive Conditioning for Your Subconscious Mind".

Interesting Links

A Happiness Formula

www.happinessclub.com

You can be happy every moment of the rest of your life. Happiness is a Decision!

www.happinessclub.com

Happiness is a Choice

www.orgcoach.net

The Secret is Out! Happiness is In!

2005-06-14T16:57:00.000-07:00

Editor's Notes

The secret to happiness is... up to you!

It's Tuesday, which means Strategies4Happiness is has arrived. Let the party begin!

Exciting things continue to happen. This list continues to grow. Thank you to all for spreading the word.

This fall, I will be publishing my book, "Strategies4Happiness". It will contain over 40 strategies that can help you or your loved ones develop and maintain their "Happiness Potential". The book has been a long time in coming, but is will be worth the wait.

As you can tell, the theme today is "Secrets". It is no secret that Happiness is yours to claim. Today's article, written by Dr. Philip E. Humbert, gives you some simple and practical tips in our journey towards a happy and fulfilled life. Enjoy.

Don't forget, this Thursday at 7:30. Looking forward to meeting you. Have a great two weeks.

Donna

Funny Business

The Secret Golfer

As a young man, Norton was an exceptional golfer. At the age of 26, however, he decided to become a priest, and joined a rather peculiar order.

He took the usual vows of poverty, chastity, but his order also required that he quit golf and never play again. This was particularly difficult for Norton, but he agreed and was finally ordained a priest.

One Sunday morning, the Reverend Father Norton woke up and realizing it was an exceptionally beautiful and sunny early spring day, decided he just had to play golf.

So... he told the Associate Pastor that he was feeling sick and convinced him to say Mass for him that day. As soon as the Associate Pastor left the room, Father Norton headed out of town to a golf course about forty miles away. This way he knew he wouldn't accidentally meet anyone he knew from his parish.

Setting up on the first tee, he was alone. After all, it was Sunday morning and everyone else was in church! At about this time, Saint Peter leaned over to the Lord while looking down from the heavens and exclaimed, "You're not going to let him get away with this, are you?"

The Lord sighed, and said, "No, I guess not."

Just then Father Norton hit the ball and it shot straight towards the pin, dropping just short of it, rolled up and fell into the hole. It WAS A 420-YARD HOLE IN ONE!

St. Peter was astonished. He looked at the Lord and asked, "Why did you let him do that?"

The Lord smiled and replied, "Who is he going to tell?"

Quality Quote

The secret of happiness is the determination to be happy always, rather than wait for outer circumstances to make one happy.
--J. Donald Walters

Happiness Tip

There is no big secret to Happiness. Happiness comes from doing the following, to the best of your ability and means:
1) Take care of you health;
2) Take care of you attitudes;
3) Take care that your actions are positive; and
4) Take care to be kind, loving and forgiving to all. Simple.

Article

Top 10 Secrets for Being HAPPY!

by Philip E. Humbert

One of my favorite songs is Bobby McFerrin's refrain, "Don't Worry, Be Happy". I recently had the opportunity to observe people's reactions when a highway was closed because of an accident ahead. As we waited, I watched as some listened to radios, a few began tossing a Frisbee, other's seemed to be working or reading, and some opted for a quick nap. But, there were also a handful who were clearly agitated and angry. Pacing about, swearing, and upset, they decided that the best response to this event, which none of us could control, was to be very unhappy. I was reminded of Abraham Lincoln's comment that, "Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be." The following are my Top 10 Tips to increase happiness in your life:

1. Decide to be a happy person. As Lincoln observed, most people, most of the time, can choose how stressed or happy, how troubled or relaxed they want to be. Choose to be happy.

2. Watch and Read less news. As a recovering news addict, I know this can be difficult because the stock market fluctuates, politicians politic, and sports teams compete.

But, most of the time, you don't need the stress. So, just don't watch. I think it was Henry Thoreau who noted that if you've ever read about a train wreck, you understand the principle and don't need to know any more about it.

3. Practice the Attitude of Gratitude. We all have so much to be grateful for. Just thanking the many people who assist us, encourage us, teach us and open doors for us could take all day!

4. Take Time. My dog has taught me much about loyalty, about noticing the sights, sounds, and smells in the yard, about being relaxed and about play. Eat when you're hungry, nap when you need it. Get your ears scratched whenever possible!

5. Laugh everyday. Hear a joke, tell a joke, laugh at yourself, laugh with your friends and family and co-workers. There are very few medicines as powerful as laughter, and I don't think you can over-dose, although it is addicting!

6. Love well. Express your affection, appreciation, friendship and warmth to those around you, and they will almost always respond in the most amazing ways! Be generous... it pays great dividends!

7. Work hard. This one comes as a bit of a surprise, but there is tremendous satisfaction in being competent, and joy in completing our assigned tasks. One of the great sources of happiness is to do work that is worthy of you, and to do it well.

8. Learn something new, everyday. To be happy, most of us must also be growing, expanding, learning and challenging ourselves. Read, listen, adapt and stretch to accommodate new ideas and new information.

9. Use your body as it was designed. Walk and run, stretch, throw things, and lift things. Dance! Exercise is good, but so is making love, mixing up a batch of cookies,
or exchanging backrubs. You have a body and it can be either a source of joy, or a ource of aches and pains.

Your choice.

10. Avoid toxins. I prefer writing positives (things to do) rather than negatives things to fear), but reality says there are negative people and there are bad chemicals, stressful noises, and unsafe places. Don't go there! Avoid poisons whenever possible. It seems to work out better that way.

Written by Dr. Philip E. Humbert, writer, speaker and success coach. Dr. Humbert has over 300 free articles, tools and resources for your success, including a great newsletter! It's all on his website at:
www.philiphumbert.com

Interesting Links

The sharing of knowledge, experiences and resources with a community of other caring individuals, in an effort to improve the well being, self esteem and Happiness of all.
www.ehappylife.com

The Secret of Happiness

www.yesmagazine.org

Your life... making life work for you!

www.self-improvement-personal-development.com

Think Positive

2005-05-31T20:08:00.000-07:00

Editor's Notes

Hello everyone! Issue #3 has arrived. Much has happened in the last two weeks. Even more is going to happen in the near future!

To all of our new members, welcome! I hope that you have as much enjoyment from reading this newsletter as I do putting it together. I have a favour to ask you. Please write me and tell me a bit about yourself. info@strategies4happiness.com). I
would like to get to know you and am curious to know how you came across my website. I look forward to hearing from you.

Here are some things that will be happening with www.strategies4happiness.com very soon. I plan to implement chat room, where we can all met and really get to know each other. I plan to set aside a time each week that I will be on-line, and that we can meet as a group.

In addition to that, I will also be setting up a Community Bulletin Board. I will let you know as soon as these things are good to go.

But that's not all. Starting in September, I will be doing a number of "Strategies4Happiness" workshops. The first workshop is slated for September 17, 2005, here in Ottawa. There will be a few more in the Ottawa area, as well as one in Kingston in November and in Kitchener early next year. Let me know if you would like to see one happen in your community. More information about the schedule, price and location will be forthcoming. Feel free to contact me if you are interested in attending. Of course, as a member of this newsletter list, you will receive a discount.

Special thanks to everyone who has helped this list grow by forwarding this newsletter to anyone you think could benefit from it. I encourage you to continue sharing it.

Thing Positive

Today's theme is Positive Thinking. There has been much written and said about the power of positive thought. Some extol its virtues, while others say that you can't just think yourself to fame, fortune and happiness. These people look down their noses at such concepts, stating that you can't just think yourself out of problems, or
that "Self Help", especially Positive Thinking is bunk, the haven for con artist and other nasty characters. But when all is said and done, you are what you think, and only you can decide what that is.

Positive thinking will not magically solve your problems. It is only the first step. In order for it to work, you must take action. Let it inspire you to take the necessary actions to achieve your goals.

Whatever you situation, you need to be realistic. Some things may just be beyond your grasp. Being positive means looking honestly at your life and finding the good, no
matter how bad. It is finding ways to deal with the pain that is sure to come your way.

Norman Vincent Peale made his mark by preaching the Power of Positively. He is best known for his book "The Power of Positive Thinking". Though some people think that this book teaches you to just ignore the evil of the world, think happy thoughts and pretend it's not there; this is far from the true. Instead, Peale says that he wrote the book, 'with deep concern for the pain, difficulty and struggle of human existence.'

It's so easy to get caught up in negative thinking. You see the news and hear all of the horrible and stupid things people are doing to themselves and to each others, and you want to scream. But by trying to create some sort of meaning out of all the mess, by focusing on the wonderful that is in our lives, by training our thoughts to see the possible, not just the pain, and taking action, we can rise above it.

I am positive you will do great things with your life, if you choose.

Donna

Funny Business

Van Gogh's Relatives

We all know that Van Gogh had an ear for painting but did you know that he also had a large family? It seemed that they all had rather unusual names. Here are few of his relatives just to give you the idea.

His dizzy aunt -- Verti Gogh

The brother who ate prunes -- Gotta Gogh

His magician uncle -- Where-diddy Gogh

His Mexican cousin -- Amee Gogh

The Mexican cousin's American half-brother -- Gring Gogh

The nephew who drove a stage coach -- Wells-far Gogh

The constipated uncle -- Cant Gogh

The ballroom dancing aunt -- Tang Gogh

The bird lover uncle -- Flamin Gogh

His nephew psychoanalyst -- E Gogh

An aunt who taught positive thinking -- Way-to Gogh

A sister who loved disco -- Go Gogh

And his niece who travels the country in a van -- Winnie
Bay Gogh

Well, there you Gogh!

Quality Quote

Pessimist: One who, when he has the choice of two evils, chooses both.

-- Oscar Wilde

Positive anything is better than negative nothing.

-- Elbert Hubbard

To respond is positive, to react is negative.

-- Zig Ziglar

Happiness Tip

When driving, the car tends to go in the direction you're looking at. When thinking, your mind goes in the direction that you're are focused on, and you are the one that decides what that is going to be. You become what you think about. So make sure to set your sights on great ideas, high concepts and enriching goals.

Article

The Power of Negative Thinking

by Remez Sasson

For some reason, most people find it easier to think in a negative way than in a positive manner. It seems that some effort is needed to think positive thoughts, whereas negative thoughts come easily and uninvited. This has much to do with education and the environment one has been living in.

In order to understand how positive thinking works, and how to use it efficiently, it is important to understand the power of negative thinking.

If you have been brought up in a happy and positive atmosphere, where people value success and self-improvement, then it will be easier for you to think positively and expect success. If you have been brought up under poor or difficult situations, you will probably go on expecting difficulties and failure.

From an early age people let outside influences shape their minds. They view everything through their predominant mental attitude. If their thoughts are positive, that is fine, but if they are negative, their lives and circumstances will probably mirror these thoughts.

If you believe that you are going to fail, you will unconsciously sabotage every opportunity to succeed. If you are afraid of meeting new people or having close
relationships, you will do everything to avoid people and relationships, and then complain that you are lonely and nobody loves you.

Do you often think about difficulties, failure and disasters? Do you keep thinking about the negative news you have seen on the TV or read in the newspapers?

Do you see yourself stuck and unable to improve your life or your health? Do you frequently think that you do not deserve happiness or money, or that it is too difficult to get them? If you do, then you will close your mind, see no opportunities, and behave and react in such ways, as to repel people and opportunities. You let the power of negative thinking rule your life.

The mind does not usually judge or examine thoughts and opinions before accepting them. If what it hears, sees and reads is always negative, it accepts this as the standard way of thinking and behavior.

The media constantly bombards the mind with a lot of information about disasters, catastrophes, wars and other negative happenings. This information sinks into the subconscious mind, and let the power of negative thinking grow. By occupying the mind with negative thoughts and expectations one radiate negative energy into the surrounding world, thus creating and recreating more negativity, failures and disasters.

The mind can be directed towards positive thinking or negative thinking. The power of thoughts is a neutral power. The way one thinks determines whether the results are positive and beneficial or negative and harmful. It is the same of energy acting in different ways.

Persistent inner work can change habits of thoughts. You must be willing to put energy and time to avoid negative thinking and pursue positive thinking, in order to change your mental attitude.

Each time you catch yourself thinking a negative thought, change it into a positive one. If you catch yourself visualizing failure, switch to visualizing success. If you
hear yourself repeating negative words, switch to positive ones.

If you hear yourself saying, "I cannot", say to yourself, "I can".

Do you repeat useless and unnecessary negative words and phrases in your mind? Change them to positive ones.

Open your mind to positive attitude, happenings and events. Expect them and think about them, and soon you life will change for the better.

Decide that from today, from this very moment, you are leaving negative thinking behind, and starting on the way towards positive thinking and behavior. It is never too late. Soon your life will turn into a fascinating, wonderful journey.
---------------------------------------------
© Copyright Remez Sasson

Remez Sasson writes and teaches about self-improvement, spiritual growth, meditation, positive thinking, creative visualization, success and mind power. He is the author of several books, and the publisher of the biweekly ezine, "Consciousness and Success".

Website: www.SuccessConsciousness.com"
Books: www.successconsciousness.com
Contact: info@successconsciousness.com
Subscribe to his ezine:
www.SuccessConsciousness.com/index_000026.htm

************************************************************
Interesting Links
************************************************************

Positive Thinking vs. Mental Misery

< a href="http://www.mckinley.uiuc.edu/health-info/hlthpro/selfestm/pos-
thnk.html" target="_new">See how you score!

Self improvement and personal growth

www.selfgrowth.com

The Power of Positive Thinking Your Key to a Happy and Better Life

www.successconsciousness.com

Take Control of Your Happiness

2005-05-17T15:04:00.000-07:00

Editor's Notes

Welcome to Strategies4Happiness Ezine, Issue Number Two! I want to say thank you to everyone who has contacted me in the last two weeks. All of your comments have been greatly appreciated. I am encouraged by the positive feedback, and I also grateful for those whose observations have alerted me to areas where improvements can be made. I want to provide a quality product, something that is useful to you, the reader.

Today's theme is "Taking Control of Your Happiness". Though your parents, spouse, friends all want you to be as happy as possible, they can't do it for you. Reality is that only you have the power and the right to do that for your life. Your happiness is in your hands! Make the choice to focus on your happiness, then take the actions to achieve it. You are in control.

Once, while going to a party with a friend, he made a comment I found rather insulting. I was very hurt and upset, and it put me in a bad mood. I thought, great, now I'm not going to enjoy myself. And it's all because of him! As we got closer to our destination, I decided that I didn't want to be a wet blanket. I needed to snap out of it. I realized that I could sit and sulk all night, or change my focus away from my pain. It had been my decision to allow the event to hurt me. I agreed to the pain. So, I took control of the situation and decided to not let it bother me any more.

Things happen to us that are not our fault. It's so easy to just say, "It's out of my hands... I can't do anything about it... it's all his/her fault", instead of taking responsibility for our life and thereby taking control. Being accountable for our reaction to events is an important step towards greater happiness.

Today's article continues on the theme of choice and control. Glen Gould talks about how we are the sum of our choices, and the 10 major areas in our lives where we have control through our choices.

So start today to take responsibility for your life, and "Take Control of Your Happiness".

Have a Happy Life!

Donna

P.S. Please help this ezine to grow. Forward a copy to two people you know and encourage them to join. For that matter, why stop at two, share it with everyone. Let's share the joy of Happiness. Thanks.

Funny Business

Words of Wisdom

I don't repeat gossip, so listen carefully.

Lord, if I can't be skinny, let all my friends be fat.

My idea of cleaning the house is sweeping the floor with
a glance.

I cleaned my house yesterday. Sure wish you could have
seen it.

This isn't clutter; these are my antiques!

Discover wildlife! Have kids!

Our policy is to always blame the computer.

Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends.

Take my advice. I'm not using it!

Mom, I'll always love you, but I'll never forgive you
for cleaning my face with spit on a hanky.

By the time you find greener pastures, you can't climb
the fence!

This house is protected by killer dust bunnies.

Every time I get the urge to exercise, I lie down till
the feeling passes.

Taken from www.cleanfunnyjoke.com.

Quality Quote

Happiness is a choice, not a chance!
Donna Hedley

Happiness Tip

Choose to be happy. Many of the situations we face may be forced on us, and we may feel that we have no control. But no matter what the situation, you are the one that decides how you will act and react. You are in control of your life, if you choose to be. So make the choices that will positively enhance your life. Choose to be Healthy, to be kind and generous, to focus on the wonderful things in your life. Oh yes, and while you're at it, why not choose to be Happy?

Article

Choices - The Search For Control

by Glen Gould

If you were to take all the choices you have made to this point in life and magically add them all together, you would have - you. Each of us is the equivalent of the choices we've made to this point in our lives. Choices. We all make them. But why?

Have you ever taken an action and wondered why? Each day we are faced with literally thousands of choices. Some occupy our thoughts on a conscious level, some do not. I thought about the color of the tie I would wear today, but I gave little thought to the turn I made out of my driveway, I just took it. Each of these were choices. Have you ever wondered why you make the choices you make?

After years of teaching golf, I discovered that many things that people do are done passively, without thought or planning. Tiger Woods does not think about how he grips the club in a tournament, he does it by "feel". Yet when he practices, he may take great care in adjusting his grip to the optimum position each and every time he grips the club.

When driving a car in excess of two-hundred miles per hour, Dale Earnhardt Jr. doesn't think about how he will move the wheel, he does it naturally.

These are examples of learned responses, things that are done almost by second nature by the performer and they are very similar to the learned responses we all have in our lives. Each of us has things we do almost subconsciously, you may visit a drive through coffee virtually without thinking about it. Marketers know this and they prey on our habits, our learned responses. McDonalds and other fast food restaurants have spent billions of dollars to train us to effortlessly and thoughtlessly spend our money on a number four with a large diet coke.

Have you ever observed the people at work and how they will instinctively reply to the question "how are you today?" Some will reply, great!, some, fair to middlin', and some I'm tired. How can someone be tired first thing in the morning? Ok, perhaps a rough night every once in a while, but these folks are tired every day. To quote Earl Nightingale, "they are just reciting their lines." Learned responses are a part of our every day life. "How are you today?" The response is the same each and every day; "fine!" Rarely to we examine the conditioned, learned responses we give and where they come from. More important is the effect they have on our lives - the learned responses we have dramatically effect our lives by providing us with our perceived reality.

What if we could alter the perception of our reality? What if we had, literally and perceptively, no limits? What could we accomplish? What could we do? How happy could we possibly be?

In order to destroy our self imposed limits, we must examine their origin and the validity of them. Each of our learned responses, our locked assumptions can be traced to one of Your Ten Relationships in Life.

The first relationship is with your family. This is the first thing you encounter in life. You were issued a mother and father, perhaps siblings and a host of in-laws and relatives. These people are in your life whether you like it or not and your reaction to them and with them directly effects your ability to have further relationships.

Next you have the relationship with your body. Once again, issued without choice. This is the first opportunity however to control.

Third: your environment. This is a vast relationship with multiple opportunities to control. Not only the immediate environment around you, but also the local, national and global environment.

Forth: Your relationship with people. Now comes the tricky part, we believe we can control for a short time, now some joker who has ideas of their own shows up.

Fifth: your spouse. Ok, significant other, long time partner, you name it. This is a person that you will allow to change your locked assumptions and perceptions. Finally, we get a choice.

Sixth: our education. Here we have a relationship of long term that we will reflect on much like our family. We are in total control of this relationship.

Next comes work. Surveys abound and the more they are conducted, the more we find people hating their jobs. Yet off we go, every day. Is this the tail wagging the dog?

Eighth: Money. No one thing in human existence is more misunderstood and misrepresented than money. If work isn't the tail wagging the dog, money is.

Ninth: the relationship you have with your past. Most people can't let go of the past and most of the time it is so exaggerated in our perception. Let's face it, nothing is ever as good or as bad as we remember it.

And most importantly, your relationship with your creator. Each of us, believers or not cannot deny that we have been created and our relationship with the creator is the most important relationship in our lives. For those who believe, this truth is self evident. For those who are non believers, your ability to justify and quantify your existence and the creation of that existence will in large part determine your ability to interact with the rest of creation.

These ten relationships will shape the way you will react in every event of your life. Most of the time you will give little thought to how they effect your decisions. You will make decisions about your life based upon your perception of your relationships in each of these 10 areas.

Our ability to determine our perception of our relationships will in large part determine our ability to achieve. Our limitless selves are there for the taking if we only adjust how we perceive our relationships in these 10 vital areas.

We must recognize from the list above and our reactions to these ten areas that life is the search for control.

About the Author

Glen Gould is a Director of The Inspiration Agents, a company of individuals with the mission of bringing positive change to the lives they encounter. He is the author of "I'll Never Be Who I Want To Be As Long As I Am Who I Am". For further information visit www.inspirationagents.com

Interesting Links

Proudly offering the finest collection of hilarious, G-rated, family-friendly Clean Funny humor.
www.cleanfunny.com

Just be the best you can be!

quantum-leap-strategies.com

A playful path to happiness.

www.deepfun.com

The Power to Choose Happiness

2005-05-03T20:46:00.000-07:00

Editor's Notes

Welcome to the first issue of the Strategies for Happiness E-zine. I am thrilled and honoured that you are have chosen join me an this adventure.

My name is Donna Hedley, and I am the editor and chief bottle washer. Thanks for being a part of this exciting new journey. It is my hope that you will find this
newsletter informative, interesting, fun, and thought provoking.

You may feel that you are already a pretty happy person. That's great! Continue with whatever you are doing. But consider this, there is always room for improvement.

If your life is not as happy as you would like to be, there is no better time then now to take action and claim you happiness. Either way, the happier you are, the more you can spread around to others, and the better off we all are.

The goal of the S4H newsletter is to present ideas and practical strategies that you can use to develop your own happiness potential. Each issue will contain a quote to
inspire you, a joke to make you laugh, a nugget of wisdom in the form of a tip, links to other websites to expand your mind and an article that will inspire and challenge
you.

Today's article is by Dr. Donald Schnell, which is both moving and timely. He talks about how we all have choices, and we have the power to choose to be happy. You can read more by Dr. Schnell on his website, http://www.SpiritualJava.com.

I would like to thank you again for taking the time to read our newsletter. I hope you will enjoy it and find it time well spent. If so, please forward it to others you know that you think would enjoy and learn from it.

I want to hear from you. Let me know how we are doing. Contribute an article or letter to the editor for an upcoming issue. Give feedback that will help this
newsletter improve and be more productive. Hey, I like a pat on the back as much as anyone. Write me at info@strategies4happiness.com.

So, here we go. Remember, the key to happiness is to take control of your life by claiming responsibility for your thoughts and actions. Happy growing!

Funny Business

You Know You've Been Drinking Way Too Much Coffee When.....

Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.

You haven't blinked since the last lunar eclipse.

You just completed another sweater and you don't know how
to knit.

The only time you're standing still is during an
earthquake.

Your so jittery that people use your hands to shake paint
cans.

You name your cats "Cream" and "Sugar."

You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.

You can outlast the Energizer bunny.

You think being called a "drip" is a compliment.

Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyd's of London.

You introduce your spouse as your coffeemate.

You think CPR stands for "Coffee Provides Resuscitation."

You think Columbia would be a great vacation destination!

You're passing everybody on the freeway when you suddenly
realize: you left your car at home!

Quality Quote

If you want to be happy, be.
Leo Tolstoy

Happiness Tip

Don't make assumptions. If you're not clear about what's going on, make sure to ask questions. Don't assume you know the answers. So often we allow ourselves to be hurt by what we think others have said or done, when if we just asked for more information, we would find that the reality is not as bad as we assumed.

Article

Choose Happiness

by Donald Schnell

It's a beautiful spring day in Beverly Hills, California. I'm looking out my window at elm trees in full leaf and roses in full bloom, and thinking about the people who
helped me get where I am today.

Mark Johnson was the kind of guy some people love to hate. He was always in a great mood and always had something positive to say. When he saw you, he enthusiastically
boomed, "Hello, my friend!" When you asked him how he was, he nearly shouted, "I'm on top of the world!" I was sometimes a little embarrassed by his noisy exuberance, but
I was glad he was my friend.

Mark was a unique worker at the Phelps Dodge Copper Mine in my home town of Ajo, Arizona. The miners followed him around. Because of his attitude, he was a natural
motivator. If one of the guys was having a bad day, Mark was there to help him see the bright side of any situation. Once I remember him taking one of the men to the bank with him after work. I later learned that Mark had personally given over half his check to help that man cover his family's medical bills. It wasn't the first time Mark had done this. Many could testify to his generosity. And those were tough times for copper miners in the 1970's-with only a decade left before the mine would close, and Ajo would turn into a ghost town.

Mark Johnson and I worked in the Smelter-the OVEN. Hot enough to melt gold. Hot enough to melt your shoes... it was Hell.

Mark's positive approach to life made me curious, so one day I asked him, "I don't get it! Everyone grumbles and complains about the hard work, the heat, and the low wages. Everyone but you. No one can be a positive person all the time. How do you do it?"

Mark had a quick answer, and a quicker smile, "Each morning I wake up and say to myself, 'Mark, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.' Don, I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. Don, I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. Don, I choose the positive side of life."

"Yeah, right, it's not that easy," I protested. "Yes, it is," Mark said. "Life is all about choices. Every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to each situation. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: it's your choice how you live life."

My job in the mines that summer was challenging. I was only 19 years old after all. I was home for the summer to try to make enough money for my sophomore year at Arizona State.

Challenging? That is a major understatement. My assignment: to shovel from the top of the OVEN the metallic soot that would build up on the roof. It took a shovel and an
industrial strength vacuum cleaner to do the job. Life threatening? Yep!

That OVEN had to be clean or it might collapse. We worked in crews of two-man teams. For safety, we strapped wooden platforms beneath our shoes. As we worked we kept an eye on our platforms, and if they started to smoke, we jumped off the OVEN before our shoes caught fire. The top of the OVEN was the hottest, because heat rises. I resented when Mark was transferred to the ICE HOUSE. He was going to work in
the coolest place in Arizona during that infernal summer.

Why not me? He now had one of the nicest jobs you could get in that fiery Hell called a copper mine. Why not me?

Things change. The miners went on strike. Mark came to me in great distress. It was the first time I'd ever seen him upset. "Don," he said, "I've got to work. I'm going to have to be a scab. I have a family to feed. My wife Becky is 8 months pregnant." Tough decision. The toughest.

In Ajo, an innocent child of a scab was once shot to death. Countless are the brutal stories I can recall of how scabs were severely beaten, crippled or killed for their decision to cross the picket line. Mark had nowhere to turn. Copper mining was the only industry in that town 100 miles from civilization. He had no money to move, no money to travel.

Sadly, I supported him in his decision. What else could I do? The next day was ugly. Hundreds of angry miners lined up to taunt, jeer and protest the few scabs who showed up to work. Mark hung his head in shame as he drove through the picket line in a company truck with armed escorts. The decision to work was fatal. But not because of the miners' hatred of scabs. Mark was assigned my job to clean the top of the OVEN. The same I'd worked on only days before. That day, witnesses saw the OVEN collapse, and my friend Mark was instantly incinerated.

Mark's death had a major impact on me. It could have been my life that was taken by that OVEN. I was a kid, and I hurt. Worst of all, I felt guilty for resenting his time in the Ice House. I felt guilty for not always welcoming his positive outlook. But, now he was gone. His family was fatherless. Because his last work was that of a scab, he was counted as a temporary worker, and the family lost all his benefits. It was a tragedy I couldn't handle. The fire of that oven burned inside my gut. I had to turn my anger, my guilt, and my sadness and pain into something positive.

I reflected on Mark's upbeat philosophy and decided that I could best honor him by being like him, and focusing on the good in my life.

Mark's untimely death taught me a valuable lesson. Life is short. There is no telling when we will be called to take the Great Adventure. Each day of our lives is precious.
Mark was 100% right. Each day is a choice. You and you alone decide what kind of day you will have. You can choose to be happy or sad, loving or hateful. Enlightenment is all about choice. What choice are you going to make today?

Remember my friend Mark this week and make the choice to be happy.

About The Author

Dr. Donald Schnell co-founded with Marilyn Diamond of it
For Life, the Spiritual Java Diet Coaching Program, that is
transforming thousands. The New Spiritual Diet, Incredible
Value, One on One coaching Amazing Results.
http://www.SpiritualJava.com or
email: Donald@spiritualJava.com.

Donald Schnell is the author of The Initiation. Free Motivational Newsletter, The Buzz
http://www.SpiritualJava.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/

Interesting Links

How a Miserable Health Club Owner Became A Happy Life Coach

Tons of tips on all sorts of things, including happiness.

This guy is happy and he wants you to be happy too.

Strategies for Happiness Newsletter

Day Ten: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

Day Five: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge - 360 Days to go!

Day Four: The Year of Living Gratefully

Day Three: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

Today, I am grateful for . . .

Being Grateful for Not So Good Things

Day Two: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge (TYofLGC)

Happy Mother's Day!

Day One: The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

Join The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

The Year of Living Gratefully Challenge

It's All in Your Mind

Keep Your Eyes on the Prize

Strategies for Happiness: How to Achieve Your Happiness Potential is now available on Amazon.

Check out this wonderful video!

Around the Kitchen Table with Donna

What Does it All Mean? - Whatever You Want It To

It’s Not Because It’s Meant to Be, It is Because I Choose It to Be

There She Goes Again!

Focus on What You Want

A Key to Happiness - Stop Trying

Forgiveness is the Key to Happiness

You Deserve the Best!

Agreeing to Choose Happiness

Think Positive?

Freedom through Forgiveness

Volume: 1 Issue: 8

Editor's Notes

Funny Business

Quality Quote

Happiness Tip

Article

Medical Intuitive Looks at Forgiveness

Interesting Links

Odds and Ends

The Happiness Habit

Volume: 1 Issue: 6

Editor's Notes

Funny Business

Quality Quote

Happiness Tip

Article

How To Develop The Habit Of Happiness

How Happy Do You Want To Be?

Have an Attitude of Gratitude

Forgive Yourself and Others

Live Your Calling

Interesting Links

Odds and Ends

Choices

Editor's Notes

Funny Business

Choice of Career

Quality Quote

Happiness Tip

Article

Today I choose...

by Bill Marshall

Interesting Links

The Secret is Out! Happiness is In!

Editor's Notes

Funny Business

Quality Quote

Happiness Tip

Article

Top 10 Secrets for Being HAPPY!

by Philip E. Humbert

Interesting Links

Think Positive

Editor's Notes

Thing Positive

Funny Business

Quality Quote

Happiness Tip

Article

The Power of Negative Thinking

by Remez Sasson

Take Control of Your Happiness

Editor's Notes